Visits With the Bat
by FatesMistake
Summary: This is the side-story that was requested for Stuff of Legend. Clark and Lex visit Wayne Manor for the weekend, and the Dark Knight shows a bit of his sadistic side when teaching Clark to fly.


A/N: This is the side-story that was requested for Protecting You. Clark and Lex visit Wayne Manor for the weekend, and the Dark Knight shows a bit of his sadistic side when teaching Clark to fly.

Don't own nothing.

~*~*~CLEX!~*~*~

Clark rolled his shoulders as he leaned against the false rock that hid the entrance to the Bat Cave. He hadn't been much help to Bruce, as Dick was better at hand-to-hand combat than he was. "Robin" had had most of the guys pinned and tied up by the time Clark and Bruce had gotten in the window. The 24 year old had forced his way through a window neither of them had seen while they had been arguing over how best to enter. He had been able to pin the Boss…some low level criminal mastermind…though, which made him feel at least a little useful.

The Batmobile rumbled up to the false cliff-side and Clark shot into the entrance as the car moved slowly into the newly opened wall. Lights clicked on along the path as the car sped toward the center of the underground hideout. Clark fell onto the rough rock with a loud sigh as Dick and Bruce hopped out of the hopped-up vehicle.

"I can't believe you guys have _actual_ villains. The most I deal with on a day to day basis is saving kidnap victims or preventing murder that the cops don't have leads on. I couldn't imagine dealing with someone who is actually _dead set_ on ruling the world," Clark grumbled as Dick stood on his washboard stomach. "Get off."

Dick crouched, not removing himself from standing on top of his friend. "Come on, Clark, it's not that hard. Same villains means you know most of their quirks."

Bruce walked over and picked the small 24 year old up by the collar of his suit. "Also means they know yours." He said, dragging the boy away towards the computers. "And you're going to be in training for the next week for that stunt you pulled."

Dick looked up, pulling off his mask, as he was dragged across the floor, the metal toes of his boots scraping against the rock. "Aw, come on Bruce, I was just trying to help! You can't punish me for doing something right for a change! Besides, Clark's only here for the weekend, and I wanted to spend time having fun for a change. Pretty please? "

"We have plenty of fun!" Bruce balked, glaring at his young lover. "What about that party we went to last weekend?"

"Really? I can't even begin to tell you how boring that gala was. I know _you _get off on having girls faun over you in an attempt to get to your wallet, but it was a total yawn-fest, Bruce. I'm talking about going to the mall, or playing video games, or pigging out on pizza and hamburgers and so much sugar our stomachs will explode kind of fun!"

Bruce sighed unhappily as he sat in his chair before the numerous screen for his computers. He pulled his side kick into his lap. "Alright, you and Clark can act like teenagers for the weekend, but you _will train,_ starting Monday." He conceded.

Robin whooped and kissed his older lover happily. He bounced over to the door that led into their changing area, but turned back to the other man. "Can't do it Monday, I've got finals all next week at Gotham U. Remember, you wanted me to have a 'proper' education?" The boy said cheekily. He ducked into the changing room, laughing, as Bruce tossed a bat-a-rang at his head.

"I don't know what I was thinking, giving into that boy's seduction. He's got me wrapped around his finger," The billionaire groused, typing his report of the nights events into the computer's encrypted journal.

"One might note that you _are_ happier, though, Master Bruce. And Master Dick really does need some time to act his own age." Came the gruff response in a heavy British accent.

"Not you, too, Alfred," Bruce grumbled, signing off of the computer.

"Of course not, sir, I was merely commenting on how long it's been since you had some real fun."

"Yeah, Bruce, when was the last time you acted _your_ age?" Dick asked, exiting the changing room.

"I'm a 34 year old business tycoon, I don't have time for 'fun'," Bruce argued huffily.

"Come on, Bruce, surely you aren't busy all the time. Even Lex makes time to have fun with me. Maybe we could all hang out tomorrow, do something fun like the mall," Clark said, jumping in to the conversation.

"Yeah, a trip to the mall would be awesome! Let's give that wallet of yours some exercise!" Dick chimed in, jumping onto the back of the super hero and ruffling Clark's black hair.

The man in spandex rolled his eyes. "You're incorrigible, Dick. You have your own allowance, you know," Clark said, dropping the slightly older boy unceremoniously on the ground. The young sidekick squeaked in protest.

"Master Dick is saving up for that new motorcycle, I believe, Master Clark," Alfred said as he gathered the armor Bruce was dropping into his waiting arms. "However, I think the young Masters have a point, Master Bruce. It has been a while since the last time you showed the public that you are, in fact, human."

The man rolled his neck as he took off his restricting head gear. "Alright, alright, we'll go the mall tomorrow after I've helped Clark with his flight issue. Are you happy, Dick?"

The boy whooped again and took off through the door that led into the mansion. And Clark grinned at the dark billionaire. "Thanks, by the way, for deciding to help me with that. Lex and I have tried just about everything to solve it, but the puzzle of flight seems to elude even his brilliant scientific mind."

"It's not a problem, Clark. You should go and find my bald friend, though. He was a wreck before we left. Seemed certain you'd come to some sort of harm at the hands of our target," Bruce said as he removed his chest gear, leaving him in his leg armor as he moved towards the changing area.

"Master Lex was in the library reading, the last I saw him," Alfred said helpfully as Clark studied the roof of the cave.

"He's still there, but he apparently gave up on reading, as he's pacing the floor now," Clark said. "Oh, no, wait, now he's talking to Dick…Oh my god!" He exclaimed.

"Uh…Bruce?" Came the tinny voice of Robin through the communicator still attached to the hero's hip.

"What did you do, Dick?"

"Um…I was teasing Lex, and I may or may not have made allusions to the bad guy having kryptonite and kidnapping Clark…Lex sort of, um…well he fainted…"

Bruce sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "You'd better pray Clark knows how to restrain Lex, because, when he comes around, that man is going to kill you."

"Yeah…I figured as much. Oh, hey Clark!" The communicator clicked off and Bruce looked around, verifying that the young super hero had vacated the cave.

"That boy is going to be the death of me," Bruce muttered.

"But at least you'll die happy," Alfred said off-handedly, wandering off to wash the armor he'd been handed as Bruce grunted in response.

"Okay, so how're we going to get me to fly?" Clark asked cheerfully.

Bruce growled as his young lover dove behind his chair in an attempt to flee the bald, glaring billionaire standing locked in the arms of his younger guest. The wind ruffled his hair as he grabbed the 24 year old by his collar and pulled him into his lap. "I told you to apologize."

"I did!" Dick protested, withering under the glare of both billionaires. "I swear I did…he's just not accepting the apology!"

"Lex, come on, he was just messing with you. I'm okay, see, nothing to worry about, alive and kicking."

"From what I heard last night, you _proved_ just how alive you were," Dick teased. He yelped and shot over his lover's shoulder, back behind the chair, when Lex jerked forward in his boyfriend's arms.

"Dick, you're not helping. And Lex, I swear, if you don't calm down I'm not letting you spend any money on me for a month, and you can go to all of your little parties alone," Clark warned.

Lex seemed to weigh his options, then regained his composure, soothing a hand over his suit. "Fine, forgiven, but I'm still not buying that brat a motorcycle."

"Dude! You were gonna buy me the new Z700?"

"Clark asked me to, yes, but I won't," Lex told him huffily.

"Aw man, but I'm still 400 dollars short!"

"You should've thought of that before you teased him and played off of his fears," Bruce said, walking over to the edge of the roof.

"Whatever," Dick grumbled, toeing the gravel that covered the whole space.

"Alright, Clark, Lex, come here."

Clark and Lex moved over to the edge of the building and looked down the 7 stories. "We already tried having me jump off of the edge of a building. Lex's castle is like 23 stories high, and I simply landed, what makes you think _less_ height will work better?" Clark asked.

"I don't, but even if you catch him before you land, some bone in Lex's body is bound to break. Means you'll _have _to fly if you want to avoid missing out on the mall trip because Lex was too busy getting a splint," Bruce explained.

"Wait, what?" Clark exclaimed as Bruce shoved his fellow billionaire off the roof.

Clark shot off the edge of the building and caught the bald man quickly, turning so that his back would hit first, but opened his eyes when the impact never came. He looked over his shoulder and saw the ground a few feet below him. He was floating, again, but this time he was fully awake.

"Now what?" Lex grumbled in Clark's arms.

"Um, I dunno…"

"Try to picture yourself moving back up towards the roof!" Bruce shouted down to them. Clark closed his eyes and did as he was instructed, and they were suddenly shooting back up to where they'd been.

"Great, I fly by force of will…that'll be _so_ easy to control," Clark grumbled as he landed beside Dick.

"Just imagine you're carrying precious cargo until you're more comfortable with flying, Clark," Lex said, brushing himself off as he was set down.

"Yeah, okay, precious cargo…got it. How'd you know I'd be able to fly to prevent Lex from getting hurt?" Clark asked, looking at Bruce.

"People do crazy things when they're in love!" Robin chirped cheerfully. "To the mall!"

"I wasn't in any real danger, in any case. Bruce had a trampoline installed under that grassy area in case you couldn't manage, at which point he would've thought of something else," Lex explained as their hosts moved back towards the door to get back into the mansion and change for the mall trip.

"Oh…okay…We're going to be mobbed at the mall, aren't we? I mean, it's not just Bruce Wayne, but Lex Luthor spending time amongst us common mortals. The media is going to have a field day," Clark said, straightening his cashmere sweater and stuffing his hands in the pockets of his designer jeans. He liked the new clothes, but they didn't look right if there was even a single ruffle.

Lex kissed him gently. "You're anything _but_ a common mortal. And Bruce owns the mall, so he probably had it closed for the day."

"This close to Christmas?" Clark balked.

Lex shrugged, moving towards the door. "It's only the 29th, there's a whole month left for everyone to get their gifts."

"Still, I mean…just so we can go to the mall?"

"Popularity has it's prices for the lesser mortals."

Clark rolled his eyes. Billionaires were…an experience. Thank the Gods his lover was at least a _little_ down to Earth, even if they were flying high.


End file.
